Hey, you B&%$es. Hey Dude, You F&%@ing fool.
Do you use these words, or phrases regularly? How about gossiping? When you gossip, is it about the good qualities in the other person or negative qualities? How angry do you get in traffic? The queue at the bank. (Yes, “dead” things, traffic and queues, but our thoughts about them have an effect on us.)
Our thoughts and our words make us. They create who we are.
My son showed me some comedy shows last night. Some of them were very funny and some of them created agitation within me. First, I could not understand why I was becoming annoyed. I was not focusing on the ones that I did not enjoy, but they still got me annoyed. And then suddenly, I realized the difference. The first group was just funny, a comedian telling his story – his inspiration was clever and witty. The second group were full of degrading remarks – being outright nasty. Plain destructive.
Now please, do not get me wrong, I also swear. These second group of comedians, and I am not sure that they really are comedians. To me they are bullies, who scare people into laughing at their “jokes”, because people are too scared not to, just now they get labelled by these individuals.
Be sure, I asked my son to immediately stop those "comedies". I do not enjoy them. (I will still discuss with him, soon, why I said to stop – maybe I will forward this blog to him. 😊 ) But then I started to think about how people talk these days. And for some or other reason, this has become the way we talk to each other.
We follow like sheep and we do not think for a moment what the effect is.
We are run by our subconscious mind. Reason – we do not live in the now and we have programmed our subconscious over the years how we want to live and be identified, and the subconscious is your genie. Your subconscious complies, while you choose to live somewhere else in your mind.
Our conscious mind, the creative part, the thinking mind, only accounts for 5% if our “mind power”. The other 95% comes from our subconscious. And that 95%, is filled with Negative and Limiting Beliefs in many people.
Now, the words and thoughts that you speak, even when you “direct” them at someone else, your subconscious does not distinguish between you and them. Every thought and word your think or utter, your subconscious takes up as though it is about you. It takes it as instruction on how to “run” your life and thoughts.
Now, that should scare you, if nothing else.
The way you have set your subconscious up, most of it unknowingly, will determine your way forward – your work life, your relationship life, your family life, your love life. Every single “life” you will experience in your living life, will be determined by your beliefs in your subconscious.
For this reason, live your life in the NOW.
How do I change my way of programming my subconscious?
1. Start counting. For a week, keep a pen paper at hand. Divide the paper into a Positive and Negative half. And now you start counting, as in counting down the days to an exciting event. Count every time you think a negative thought, or you utter negative words. Not only about yourself, every single word and thought about other people and things. The person you get angry with in the traffic. The frustration you have with the copier. But remember, also count the positive thoughts and words you have. Every time you said thank you. Every time you complimented someone on their achievement, their outfit, work well done, etc. Give yourself a “tick” when you have allowed someone into the line, without giving them an angry look. Remember, also when you did not kick the copier, but you calmly looked to see if there is still paper in, or if there is not a paper jam. Every time you told yourself, I can't do a task, I am not good enough or I do not deserve it. I am fat, I have an ugly nose. At the end of the week, have a strong coffee or tea on hand, and then start counting.
2. Take your mom’s advice. My children still say, we know : If you have nothing good or nice to say, rather say nothing. But add your thoughts to this. Thoughts are powerful. All you must do is think about how often have thought about something or someone, and BOOM, there they are. Rather, think about a beautiful picture or story you heard, right in that moment. Your children’s smile or joy is always an excellent go to. Now, you are beginning to live in the now, now you take charge of your subconscious. In that very moment, make the decision to think something nice, or to say something nice. Even if you do not really mean it in that moment, does not matter. You are busy re-programming your subconscious.
3. You are water. Please read up on the research done by Dr Masaru Emoto. Basically, what they did, was to take water from various dams and rivers. They then either “exposed” the water to various religious prayers, or song. Some they only labeled the bottles with words like love, grace, etc. The energy put out by the person writing the label, had an effect on the water. Long story short, they photographed the various crystals formed by the water. You are 70% water – now, think again about what effect your words and thought have on you.
4. Say no thank you. When you find yourself in an environment where you feel that you are getting agitated, or annoyed, please say not thank you. I do not want to be here. I am going to remove myself. I do not have to listen to the words that are being directed towards me and the people around me. You do not have to scream and shout. Remember, your reaction, has an effect on you. You choose – will it be positive or negative?
5. Choose your friends. Unfortunately, we do not give enough value to this. We feel pity for people who are alone. We crave not to be alone. But, have you ever stopped for a moment and asked yourself, the person who is alone, what kind of energy do they put out to the world? Or do you follow and stay around the bully, because you are too scared that you will be picked out? But, does the bully instill positivity into your life? I, personally, have never felt uplifted by a bully. I have never felt encouraged to go out and follow my dream, by a bully. Maybe, the person who is alone, chose to be alone rather than to be in the negative space around certain people. Maybe, take the time and speak to the person who is “alone”. You might be pleasantly surprised about what they have achieved, how easy their lives flow, their outlook on the world. You might just find a truck load full of positivity and support from the “alone” person.
Take responsibility today, here and now, for how you think and talk, from now and into the future. Every word and thought you have, molds your tomorrow. Right now, is your tomorrow.
Is your tomorrow going to be positive or negative?
Sue Leppan
Transformation Life Coach
NLP Practitioner
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